I am the niche

Today I was called to refine my vision and get more clear on what I’m doing here. I realized maybe I wasn’t being as authentic as I thought, because I kept running into this analysis paralysis. There was this subconscious effort of, “How can I curate this in a way people will like?” Then realizing, wait… is that really me though?

That question got me thinking about how personality plays into this whole online thing — sometimes even more so than skill when it comes to success. I know I have skills, but I still wonder: “Who am I anyways to be doing this?” I’m still learning to walk in this new version of myself.

This is the process though. Hello, imposter syndrome. I have to remind myself not to forget that it’s our personality that shapes our personal reality.

It seems that I’ve lived backwards most of my life — letting my reality, other people, and external factors shape who I am. I’ve been the chameleon. The people pleaser. The self-abandoning good girl.

For what? For who? People that didn't care to see beyond themselves? That didn’t see me? People that if I had the choice I didn’t actually want to be around? People that used or even abused me? Not only did I trade my comfort to suit theirs, but when it comes down to it, I was lying.

Now I’m learning to separate my self-worth from what I can do or be for others, and just be me for myself first. If I’m not liked, it just means I’m not around the right people. "You attract what you are...” This is true. And I can’t help thinking about all the amazing people I probably missed out on while I was hiding.

I guess I have to be in the driver’s seat now.

I’m not into being a “boss babe,” a “coach,” an “influencer,” or an “expert.” I’ve hustled enough in the matrix already. It paid off in its way, but… I AM TIRED. Tired of being sick and tired.

What I want instead is a life that returns — naturally and reciprocally — through authenticity. To be present, to listen, to show up. To help through healing, and heal through helping.

I can’t do that sustainably if I’m burning myself out working for an agency or corporation that asks me to compromise my values or my sense of self. I connect well on a personal level — while the corporate idea of “professionalism” always felt performative. Restrictive. Soul-zapping. And I don’t ever want to act like I have all the answers because I don’t. What I do know is I’m good at offering guidance, fresh perspectives, and neutrality.

In my world, disagreeing doesn’t mean conflict or criticism. And I believe in conversations about solutions over circular arguments. I can hold opposing views and understand both sides. But that doesn’t mean overlooking poor moral integrity. I’ll always dig to uncover many if not all layers. If we can do that together, there can be progress.

Depth. Nuance. Complexity. Yes, please.

One thing that sets me apart is recognizing how narratives of helplessness keep people stuck. (And no, this is please not to be confused with victim-blaming.) The truth is, personal ownership opens the door to empowerment. Without it, what’s left?  Putting blame on everything and everyone else expecting the external factors to change?  Yeah ok, how is that working out? A whole lot of entitlement, nihilism, and narcissism.

If each of us took greater accountability for ourselves, our connections would naturally transform. Even if that means letting go of some to make room for new ones.

So what’s the point, Echo? After asking myself: What is your passion? What comes so naturally it doesn’t even feel like work?

Relationships.

Of course, the first voice in my head was an inner critic I'm still working on telling off: “Not another relationship coach.”

But here’s the thing: clearly there still aren’t enough people committed to healing and growing connections. If there were, we’d all be thriving in harmony by now.

And I’m not just talking about relationships with others. It starts with the one we have with ourselves. Too many people get into relationships just to avoid being alone. But if you don’t have a level of self-mastery or contentment in solitude, how can you truly show up for someone else? Otherwise, you just chase others to fill a void.

Which brings me back to the core: self-worth, authenticity, reciprocity. I want to explore why so many relationships don’t last. To unpack them with accountability instead of blame. To help facilitate healing and reconnection between people in a world that has been divided — psycho-socially, economically, politically. Because men and women need each other. People need each other. We need each other - now more than ever. So who am I? What am I doing? What is my niche? It's me. I am the niche. Relationships are my thing: emotional intelligence, self-awareness, empathy, and everything that flows from them. Relationships exist everywhere, with everyone, and they deserve to be carried out more consciously if we want better outcomes.

The personal is professional. The professional is personal.

At the end of the day, I’m not here to fit into a category though. I’m here to show up as myself — leaning into being “too much” rather than staying small. To keep learning, and to invite others to do the same. If I can live that out through relationships — with myself, with others, with the world — then I know I’m in alignment with my code and on the right path.

♡Echo

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